You can have an ungodly soul tie with the person you refuse to forgive

Did you know we can have an ungodly soul tie with the person we refuse to forgive? Many wonder why the term, “soul ties,” is used in the ministry of inner healing. A soul tie is formed between two people that can be either a bridge of blessing or a bridge of cursing. We are familiar with the biblical story of Jonathan and David and their pure, brotherly relationship. 1 Samuel 18:1 says, “the soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul.” This godly soul-tie was a bridge of blessing.

READ MORE: Sexual soul ties are real - and dangerous

But through sinful acts, ungodly soul ties can be created that bring curses into our life. In Genesis 34, such a tie was created when Dinah was defiled by Shechem. Verse 3 says, “His soul joined to Dinah.” Shechem professed his love for Dinah, but it was far from a pure and godly love and resulted in curses of defilement and shame. Jewish sources cite that Dinah was so humiliated and shamed she felt she could not go home and stayed imprisoned in Shechem’s house. In verse 26 her brothers freed her by killing Shechem. Ungodly soul ties keep us bound to another until they are severed by the sword of the spirit.

It should come as no surprise that a sexual act creates spiritual soul

It should come as no surprise that a sexual act creates spiritual soul and body ties because Paul told the Corinthians, “Don’t you realise that if a man joins himself to a prostitute, he becomes one body with her?”

READ MORE: I was so afraid I couldn’t even go to church without having a panic attack, but forgiveness helped me heal

Thus, we can form ungodly soul ties with those we sinned with, those we sinned against, and those who sinned against us by manipulating us, abusing us and betraying us. Moreover, we always have an ungodly soul tie with a person we refuse to forgive, which is part of the reason we obsess over them day and night. Ironically, the person we despise and can’t forgive is the person we are tied to through an ungodly soul tie.

While ungodly soul ties keep us bound to the person who offended us, unforgiveness keeps us bound to our own offenses. Jesus said, in Matthew 6:15: “But if you don’t forgive others of their offenses, your Father will not forgive your offenses.” The word “forgive” is from the Greek word “aphesis,” which means “to release from bondage” or “freedom from.” If we don’t offer others freedom from their sins against us, God cannot offer us freedom from our own sin and bondage.

When we don’t forgive, our soul is relegated to a spiritual prison, and any sacrifice we try to offer God while holding others in emotional jail he will not accept. But when we repent and ask God to forgive the sin that we committed with that person, or the sin they committed against us, we can then break the ungodly soul tie and both are set free.

READ MORE: There is power in forgiveness

When Nick and I married, we set about to break all ungodly soul ties from past relationships

When Nick and I married, we set about to break all ungodly soul ties from past relationships, knowing that old sin patterns could enter our marriage through those ties. This was a sweet time of honesty and vulnerability between us as we confessed and broke old ties. When a client tells me they can’t get an ex-partner out of their mind, I know a soul tie needs to be broken, and forgiveness extended. Afterwards, many are pleasantly surprised to see that the marriage no longer strives from old jealousies, distrust and insecurities. There is healing and renewal, and that is the power of forgiveness.

Prayer

Father God, I renounce the lie that I can’t forgive. I can forgive because your Holy Spirit empowers me to. I renounce the lie that when someone hurts me, I must control the situation by withholding love, forgiveness, or acceptance. When I do these things, I take justice into my own hands because I inwardly fear that the person who hurt me will get away with it. But your Word says in Romans 12:19, “Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God. For the Scriptures say, ‘I will take revenge: I will pay them back,’ says the Lord.”

I want to obey you now and release those who have wronged me. In the name of Jesus, I forgive _____ (name of person) for _____ (hurting me, betraying me).

I repent of my sin, and I repent of the sin that was done to me, placing it all under the blood of Jesus. In the name of Jesus, I sever the ungodly soul tie that was formed between me and _____, and I release him/her. I declare over myself that I am no longer bound; I am set free, and he whom the Son sets free is free indeed! Amen!