Kelsey Rygh took an honest and vulnerable look at her behaviour in relationships, and realised something that had stopped her finding her now fiance.
In 2019 I began writing a book to encourage myself and other singles longing to be married. I wanted to champion hearts to remember that life is more than just the end result of a wedding day and a ring.
The message was meant to remind readers of the reality of knowing the Lord is enough and that our value isn’t defined by our marital status. Life was meant to be enjoyed with God, and whatever the times and seasons held, it had to be good, because God was in it.
In 2020, I released the book, “Waiting with God: Experiencing the Beauty of Singleness.” In 2022, I was living with some friends out in the middle of nowhere Colorado on five acres. I was still single and about to approach 40, which carried an undercurrent of disappointment in some ways.
I would often joke around, “Unless I’m gonna marry the Amazon delivery guy, I don’t know how I am ever going to meet somebody out here.”
I would often joke around, “Unless I’m gonna marry the Amazon delivery guy, I don’t know how I am ever going to meet somebody out here.” At that time, one of my friends wanted to set me up with a guy she had known for over twenty years. He lived in Texas but was going to be passing through Colorado that summer and she thought we would hit it off. Well, we met and went on a couple of dates. He was sweet and we had a great time, but he lived a few states away, wasn’t my type and didn’t check all the boxes. His walk with God was so different than mine and in my religious zeal, I told him I didn’t have “peace” about anything more than a friendship.
Over the next year, I kept trying to put myself out there and went on blind dates, online dates and even speed dating in pursuit of love. Throughout the year, I would randomly think about that Texan I met and wonder if I shut things down too quickly. One night, doing some soul searching and looking back over a journal, I realized throughout my single years, that if I was afraid and didn’t want to take any risks on a relationship, I would simply set it under the banner of “I don’t have peace” and move on. But the Lord, in his kindness, revealed that I was actually struggling with anxiety when it came to opening my heart to a relationship.
I realized throughout my single years, that if I was afraid and didn’t want to take any risks on a relationship, I would simply set it under the banner of “I don’t have peace” and move on.
So, in wanting to operate in the opposite spirit of fear, I decided to reach back out to that Texan in the fall of 2023. At first, he was not interested in reconnecting with me. After all, I said I didn’t want anything more than friendship with him. But the Father turned his heart toward me and prompted him to call me and we have been talking every day since. When we first met, I completely misjudged him because he encountered and experienced God differently than me.
In all reality, he wasn’t what I envisioned, but he’s better than I could have ever dreamed. With time I realized he has a depth in God that inspires and provokes me. He is the king of patience and loves those around him incredibly well. He has slowly built trust and in partnership with the Father opened my heart to receive the most extravagant love I have ever experienced. He is the calm in my storm, the wind in my sails, the breath of fresh air to my days. I don’t know how God has been working behind the scenes all these years, but I know without a shadow of a doubt that he has fashioned this man for me and knit our hearts together.
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I was about to miss out on the most incredible man because of a religious spirit that said my approach to God was better than his. I almost passed up the opportunity to experience the pursuit of a God-fearing and adventurous man because of anxiety and fear. But God was bigger than it all and brought us together in love. And that’s where we will choose to stay moving forward.
This summer he asked me to marry him and I said “Yes!” We will be married on 12/12/24 and couldn’t be more thrilled to walk into a new season with God. Waiting with God isn’t easy, but I can say, more convinced than ever, it’s always worth it. His best, in HIS timing, becomes our best.
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