While Bonnie Blue claims her content provides a better narrative for teenage boys than they would receive watching porn, Sally Hope suggests she’s not giving them anything different - or beneficial - at all.
Twenty-five-year-old “Bonnie Blue” has recently been causing controversy claiming that she makes £600k a year sleeping with “barely legal” teenage boys of 18 and 19, filming it and posting it on her OnlyFans. She claims her videos are “educational” but as a mum of teenage boys I worry not just about the predatory aspect of her videos but about the message she’s giving to young men about women.
Bonnie Blue claims, quite rightly, that porn sites are dominated by videos of older men having often aggressive and violent sex with “barely legal” teenage girls. She claims that she is filling a “gap in the market” by producing content with the roles reversed and that it’s unfair that she is receiving so much criticism for simply doing the same thing that men are. She feels that her content provides a better message for teenage boys than they would receive watching porn. But she’s not giving them a different message at all.
When men deliberately seek out teenage girls for sexual encounters they do so because the difference in age creates a power imbalance in their favour.
When men deliberately seek out teenage girls for sexual encounters they do so because the difference in age creates a power imbalance in their favour. By targeting young men Bonnie Blue is doing the same thing, and sending the same message that sex is about power and control.
‘Pornography has been normalised in our culture’
She argues that she wouldn’t receive the same criticism if she were an older man with young women. She’s probably right. But just because men get away with behaving in predatory ways, doesn’t mean women should seek to do the same, rather than lowering ourselves to the same level, we should seek to hold men to higher standards when it comes to how we treat those more vulnerable than ourselves sexually.
But just because men get away with behaving in predatory ways, doesn’t mean women should seek to do the same
In addition Bonnie has made some very misogynistic comments about men cheating. She said that men cheat because their wives are “lazy” and “don’t want to have sex” so they’re going to “get it somewhere else.” Her comments suggest that despite her claims to be a sexually liberated woman, she still believes that women exist to sexually pleasure men and that women’s own enjoyment is a secondary matter. Her suggestion that wives are obligated to have sex with their husbands, and are to blame if their husbands commit adultery is the kind of message I’d expect to hear from the likes of Andrew Tate.
I once seriously considered becoming a lap dancer but God later revealed to me the sacredness of my sexuality
Sadly, the message that wives are obligated to provide sex on demand to their husbands is just as prevalent in Christian culture as it is in porn. Sheila Wray Gregoire, author of The Great Sex Rescue found that 25% of Christian men believe that they are entitled to sex on demand from their wives. There are still Christian men who believe that women are the possessions of men, that we exist for their gratification only, that we must submit to their authority, that power and control should exist within sexual relationships, and indeed within marriage and even the Church. They wrap these ideas up in theology and selected verses of scripture, but peel away the layers of spirituality and you’ll see the same putrid message of power and control that is at the root of all predatory and abusive behaviour.
GREAT SEXPECTATIONS: I’m in debt. Is it okay for me to sell pictures of myself online?
As Christians we’re called to be different, to be a light to the world. When it comes to how we relate to one another as men and women we have all the tools we need to do better, we have a saviour who taught us to lay down all desire for power and control in relationships and to root all our choices in loving behaviour. Bonnie Blue is a product of secular cultures broken sexuality, we can tut and frown at her all we like, but until we start following Jesus’ teachings and fix our own broken sexuality we really have no room to talk.
No comments yet